Chez Spud

Creeps in quietly and looks around … is there anybody there, said the traveller, knocking on the moonlit door etc etc..no one? In the meantime I’ll just whitter on to myself. I’m an only child, I’m used to it. Also, I remain sure in the knowledge that there is no one more fascinating in the universe than myself (I’m an only child, did I mention that already?)

Welcome to chez spud, home to random ramblings, chitchat, old fashioned yarns, hopes ‘n’ dreams ‘n’ fears, a lot of chat about children all washed down with a gallon of tea and cake. Any takers?

I’m not going to bother with a tedious introduction about myself, what films I like, what books I’ve read, my hobbies and other dreadful trivia.  Let’s bypass all that and assume I’m a regular normal person yadda yadda yadda, I watch the stuff you watch, I read the stuff you read….let’s cut to the chase and get intimate (no not like THAT, it’s far too early, and I’m British remember). So here is the first of a series, 30 secrets in 30 days…30 little known facts about me and a photo or two to boot.

Listen and learn…

Secret 1…I have double jointed elbows. Well, I don’t as there is no such thing but that’s the phrase most of you normal jointed folks use. My elbows hyper extend, see freaky photo and you’ll get the idea. They also then rotate kind of back on themselves too, hard to get a shot of that. Every now and again my head spins round too….and I have this strange 666 marking on my scalp…

Alas there is no useful purpose to my flexi arms beyond sheer entertainment value. In a previous job I was made to ‘do the arms’ for all new members of staff, as part of their induction. Kind of, ‘Here’s the photocopier, here’s the stationary cupboard,  oh and here’s our resident freak…go on, do the arms’. And then some poor person would have to politely watch me do my party trick and attempt not to vomit.

Random musing – I have finally worked out who I look like with my new, dodgy growing out hair style. Imelda Staunton. This came to me during pilates this morning whilst admiring my downward dog in the mirror. I caught a glimpse of myself from the side and, trying to ignore my big red face, it finally clicked. Imelda Staunton, and not in a good way either.

If you liked that, you might like this ...

• Another day…another secret…I bought my husband on the internet
• Secret 4 – I lack intellectual curiosity
• This girl…with thanks to Julochka
• 30 Secrets in 30 days…everyone’s at it now!
• FINALLY…Secret 30…I am a Big…Fat…Liar…