Sep
22
2009
Lost: one mojo
Mojo? Mojo, where art thou? Mojo? Come out, come out wherever you are…here kitty kitty kitty.
Now here’s the thing. I have TOTALLY lost my photographic and blogging mojo. Cry. I can’t find it anywhere, I’ve looked in all the usual places, I’ve retraced my steps, I’ve looked down the back of the sofa and everything. No sign of it. It’s been like this since I got back from Blog Camp 2.0 if I’m honest, perhaps I left it in the Blue Room at Julochka’s house?
I’m hardly picking up my camera and am scraping through my 365 project on Flickr by the skin of my teeth (the photo is above is yesterday’s effort, yet another Megaboy filler shot). I just don’t seem to have any inspiration in terms of what to photograph, or what to blog about. My grandfather is now very sick and frail, it’s his 90th birthday on Thursday and I know this is the last year we will celebrate this with him. I feel consumed with sadness, nostalgia and panic, but mostly anxiety about how he must be feeling now he knows the end isn’t so far away. My Dad visited him this weekend and my Grandad told him to help himself to any tools he wanted from the shed, “But I don’t want tools, I want you Dad” replied my father. And that’s the nub of it…it doesn’t matter how old my Grandad is, what a good and long life he has led, how much it will be better for him not to be in pain anymore…we don’t want to let go of him, we’re not ready for that.
I don’t know what to send him for his birthday, I can’t think of anything remotely appropriate given the circumstances. So I’ll send some photos and perhaps make a storyboard with them. That’s the challenge I will set myself today: pick up the camera and shoot a birthday storyboard for my Grandad.
On which note (storyboards), I was directed to a brilliant blog with absolutely stacks of free actions, presets, textures, tutorials, storyboard templates etc yesterday. It’s called CoffeeShop and is well worth a look around. She has lots of tutorials for Blogger people, and step by step instructions for making headers etc etc. Thanks to Aspidistra who pointed me in the direction of CoffeeShop. Check out her photostream, amazing shots and really interesting photoshopping too. Hmmm, ponders getting Aspidistra to do a guest blog for Camera Club…
Back later with some shots to share. Wish me luck!
Sorry about your grandfather, Spud. It must be an awful feeling to face the certainty of death in such a way
I hope the storyboard cheers him up and maybe even helps you find the mojo.
Missing you very much! xxx
It´s really hard to get inspired when you´re consumed with other issues. Sorry about yor Pop. Sending warm thoughts your way. And some Mojo. Love. xxx
I know how it feels when you lose your mojo. I’m still looking for mine!
I’m sorry about your Grandad, the unavoidability of death is an awful thing to face. I also hope the storyboard cheers him up.
a storyboard sounds like the perfect idea. sending you hugs. p.s. i think maybe your mojo is with my mojo having a beer somewhere…
I am sure he will love the storyboard…
I don’t know if my or other people’s words would help. but just want to say that it’s touchable… it’s hard to lose. and it really make sense if you don’t want to let go of him… I’m sorry. and keep thinking of you and your beloved grandpa.
xo
I’m so sorry about your Grandad. Your mojo will come back when you are ready for it. Good luck with the story board.
You’ve been doing all these posts without your mojo? Could’ve fooled me!
Sorry your time with your Grandad is coming to a close. I’m sure he’ll love the photos!
Ah… Yes, my sweet! I feel your pain. There are simply no words – Love and comfort to you.
Oh dear sweet Spud. There does seem to be a theme of holding on in your life right now with things that don’t want to be held onto. Your mojo and your grandad. You may need to just let them both be exactly as they are right now.
Actually, I believe our mojos have run off together. Perhaps they have eloped and we are now in-laws. You can’t force your mojo, you’ll only piss it off (mojos are very moody). That brilliant philosopher Winnie the Pooh once said, the hurrier I go the behinder I get. Well creativity is like that. The more you grab at it, the more it disappears.
And oh how awful about your grandad. He too seems to be gently moving into a new phase of his existence, one in which he must leave his body behind. I am still sending him light and loving thoughts. With a few for you too.
Be gently with yourself dear Spud.
XOXOXOX Liz
If you’re mojo disappeared with Blog Camp then perhaps this is like that period following Christmas and New Year where everything is a little less shiny for a couple weeks because all of the excitement is calming down. I hope so, because that doesn’t last for too terribly long and you’ll be back to your old self soon.
I’m so sorry about your granddad. I lost my last grandparent 2 weeks ago and it’s all still a little raw. Be sure to soak in all the time you can dear and we’ll be thinking of you.
So sorry to hear about your grandfather – your father’s reply to him sums it all up.
I think your idea of doing a storyboard is fantastic. I can’t imagine there’s anything he’ll enjoy more that pics and tokens of those he loves.
methinks you need a project. what happened to the seven deadly sins chez spud edition? that might help it come back.
tho’ frankly, i know what you mean. and i think it’s september blahs. we’re in denial as to the coming winter.
I’m so sorry to hear about your Grandad – I think a storyboard is a wonderful idea. Words just aren’t enough xxx
I think there must be a collection of mojos all having a right royal knees up somewhere as mine is missing too. Thanks for the link and your kind words though – glad the Coffeeshop link was useful. I really need to spend more time investigating everything on there.
sending lots of hugs to you, sweetie.
Huge hug xx
so sorry to hear about your grand dad. story board sounds like a great idea and with your photography skills i think you ll bring a smile on his face a nd maybe even help you find your mojo!
the links were great. thank you for sharing. i have further shared them http://urbaniche.blogspot.com/2009/09/fractured-and-casted.html
good luck!
Oh I am sorry to hear about your Grandad. I’m constantly anxious about my Grandma, who’s also 90 and struggling back in Sydney.
Be gentle on yourself and don’t worry if you don’t feel like blogging. I can totally, relate, though, keeping up with a blog is tiring! xx
Thanks everyone, your words are so kind and so appreciated xx
OK I am catching up a little and know what you mean about lacking inspiration… me too!!! Although with me I think it’s cos I hardly get time to pick up my camera these days.
I know what you mean as far as Grandad goes. I recently made a photo book and sent it to my Mum so that she can see what fantastic pictures I have been taking with the Nikon. I also put some poetry in there for her, there’s not much else she can really enjoy these days.
Chin up chicken!!!!
I think that you’ve got lots and lots of mojo, Spud. Maybe you are just too sad to recognize it? I’m so sorry about your grandfather. My last grandparent died four years ago, but strangely, my memories of ALL of my grandparents seem to get more vivid as the sadness at their actual dying fades. I suppose that only those had good lives and lots of love want to cling . . . which is really very nice, in its own poignant way.