Able by the abilities you have
Posted under Witterings
“You’re not disabled by the disabilities you have, you are able by the abilities you have”…the personal motto of South African paralympic runner Oscar Pistorius. What an interesting stance. I knew nothing of him until yesterday when Bertie was reading a book about the Olympics which had a picture of him in it. What was so interesting to me was how long it took Bertie to spot his prosthetic lower legs, he was completely oblivious to them. I asked him what was different about the man in the photo, ‘He’s not winning?’ he said. Eventually he spotted that his lower legs were different, but wasn’t much interested in hearing about the “Blade Runner” and how he’s competed in ‘able bodied’ races because he can run so extraordinarily well.
In truth, whilst he understands what it means to be disabled, I don’t think he has any appreciation of what it actually means. Like most children he’s much more accepting and tolerant of people who are different than him. When does that change I wonder? Or have we moved on enough in terms of equality for all that he’ll continue not to differentiate? There is a child in his class with special needs. On her first day Bertie told me about her and what her problems are. “And?” I said, gearing up for the ‘we’re all different’ talk, “And that’s the end of the story” he replied. Just as it should be.
I shouldn’t be phased by the disability/able bodied issues. My mother taught at a school for what was called ‘handicapped children’ for 20 years. Very un PC these days. The school doesn’t exist anymore, no longer needed with the move to integration in to mainstream school for children with special needs. And she was ‘disabled’ herself, crippled with arthritis from her early 20s.
I think its the terminology that I struggle with. ‘Able bodied’…what does that really mean? I don’t think many of us are truly ‘able bodied’…seems like everyone has got a dodgy back, clicky knees, a touch of arthritis here and there, weird pains from old injuries that niggle…we’re all working around our own physical issues and limitations, to a greater or lesser degree. ‘Normal’ is all wrong of course, since no one is. I couldn’t even explain what it is about the Paralympics that makes it something significant and special without drifting in to being patronising. The bottom line is that all Olympians (both Paralympians and the other sort that I can’t and won’t classify) are outstanding athletes. Full stop.
“You are able by the abilities that you have”. Such a neat turn of phrase, so spare and elegant. A motto for not just for sport but for life if ever I saw one…revealed to me thanks to a child’s reading book.
If only we had the vision to spot those abilities in ourselves more often.
That is a very elegant phrase both for use in daily life but also in respect of others – nice to focus on the positive rather than identifying and bringing forward elements that might not actually be the first (or second) thing you notice about a person
What a beautiful motto.
Great quote!
Isn’t it wonderful when all that stuff we’ve been saying actually gets incorporated into their lives? Quin has three friends that she is closest to at school, one has type 1 diabetes, one is blind from ocular cancer, and one has Raynaud’s (the circulation disorder). After grousing about her birthday party coming up with five screaming teens in March, I was shut down by the crowd that arrived. I realized that all that talking I did was listened to and my daughter didn’t look at the outsides to find her friends. humbling…..
Ah Stacey…so good when our parenting comes back to haunt us in good ways! x