Chez Spud

Mentoring

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Size matters

I couldn’t quite settle on which photo to use for this post, so I chose this one because it always makes me laugh and the bird up top is my best friend (generally known as The Wife) and photography mentor. Mainly I chose it because it makes me laugh and that’s a good enough reason as any. I think we must have both had a lot more time on our hands when we set up this shot a few years back. Happy days.

Do you have a mentor? I have a couple of people I turn to for help and advice on a professional level, but I wouldn’t say I have a mentor as such at the moment, but that’s not to say I wouldn’t benefit from one. I’ve had a couple of absolutely stellar mentors over the years but I’ve either moved on from them, or lost touch with them…another sadly died. I’m absolutely confident I wouldn’t have achieved what I have, career wise, without the wise counsel and advice of this group of Wise Ones.

One of my previous mentors is now Very Famous and I would think probably a bit busy to help me out, a shame because she was a fantastic supporter and ‘champion’ for me as I was just starting out in my current career. I’ve reached a stage in my career where it’s me being the mentor now, and I enjoy doing it. About 10 years ago I was a formal mentor for 12 months for a vulnerable child though the charity Chance UK. It wasn’t an easy year and I’m not sure what lasting benefit 3-4 hours a week made for the boy I worked with. But he, his mother and his school were adamant at the end of the 12 months that his behaviour, concentration and self-esteem improved enormously. Does mentoring really have such power?

I have always chosen mentors whom I admire and want to emulate, both in terms of their success, they way they deal with other people and the way that they are perceived by others. I’ve had career mentors, mentors who helped me learn how to manage difficult teams, ‘technical’ mentors who’ve helped me learn my craft, ‘life’ mentors (aren’t they called friends?), photography mentors (waves at The Wife), blogging mentors, crochet mentors, grief mentors…you name it, I’ve sucked the lifeblood out of some poor soul about it…mwah ha ha.

A friend of mine is having a well-publicised mid-life crisis. To help her through it she’s hired a life coach, which is surely just a grand title for a paid mentor? Together they have mapped out some Life Goals which is helping my friend assess options and make choices about what she wants to do with her career, her family and their life together. At first I was rather bemused by the whole idea though, really, it’s no different than working with a mentor. The significant difference, I suppose, is that a Life Coach comes with an independent eye and ear..in a way that a mentor doesn’t. Personally I’d prefer to work with someone who really ‘knows’ me, but perhaps I’ll feel differently when my own mid-life crisis comes around…assuming it does.

I hadn’t really noticed the absence of a mentor in my professional life until my old one hit the news over the last couple of weeks. Perhaps that just means I’ve outgrown the need for one, and it’s just nostalgia kicking in? I’m somewhat treading water, careerwise, and have been for a while since that has suited the needs of our family. But troubling ‘Is this it?’ thoughts waft through my mind every now and again. I bat them away and remind myself how fortunate I am to have the role that I have, but I don’t think I can ignore the nagging doubts forever.

I either need a mentor or a jolly good kick up the backside. Any takers for either?

 

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10 Responses to “Mentoring”

  1. Oh gosh! now I need a mentor. Actually, I’ve been a mentor too – to a youth in the youth justice system along time ago, so maybe it’s time for karma to return the favour. Life coaches are great but expensive, which makes them difficult to ignore if your not liking things.
    I’m wondering who your famous mentor is? Kenneth Clarke – he’s been in the news?

  2. Guffawing very loudly at it being Kenneth Clarke…um, no…!

  3. Hee hee I remember this pic the first time and I remember how much I loved Ly’s shoes. Can’t remember why you were offering her a Le Crueset??

    Well done to your previous mentor – am sure she will do a stunning job :-D

  4. You know, I don’t think there ‘was’ a reason other than it was an object I had a Big and Small one of? Of course they are also ‘the saucepans’…

  5. I like Lily’s shoes too! I hope you find just the right person to guide you in the direction you want and need to go.

  6. I need a mentor. I’ve been thinking about this for some time, and had some coaching at work – which was great as far as it went, although my coach is now leaving the organisation – but I’m really convinced it’s a mentor I need. I need something to help with some direction – how to fulfil my potential.

    The problem is choosing the right person to ask, and working out the best way to pitch it! If they haven’t mentored before, there is an element of what’s in it for me…?

  7. If your council of Wise ones, for some reason, becomes too large I wouldn’t mind if you referred one or two to me. They still need to be alive though.

    Have fun while searching.

  8. I have been assigned a mentor at work and guess what? she SUCKS the big one!!! seriously, I don’t even bother with her.
    It’s been on my mind too, I think because like you i’m alone in the world (so to speak) trying to keep those plates spinning without family in close proximity is a tough job. Everyone without exception should have a good mentor, and a good saucepan. :0)

  9. Love that picture. It was ‘size does matter’ or something and was one of the HPAD challenges I think. Love that you POSTED me that mini pan. aww. And I am flattered and slightly bemused that I am your photography mentor, you need no advice from me. Perhaps a gentle nudge when it comes to “should I buy this?” – YES, of crouse and perhaps get some new shoes whilst you’re there.

    I could really do with a professional mentor but it’s hard to know who would a) want to and b) whose work I admire enough to be worthy of such a position in my life. HA HA!
    x

  10. I would love a mentor, someone I could turn to and say is this really how it is, what can I do, what should I do – instead the nearest person to my situation has a full time househusband and doesn’t really understand the forces and pressures I face. Sigh.

    I also wish I could find someone to help me see the other opportunities out there – or at least give me a kick in the right direction

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